The Flying Ship

The Flying Ship

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

How Ironic.

Definitions of Tia:

  • noun: brief episode in which the brain gets insufficient blood supply; symptoms depend on the site of the blockage
  • name: A female given name (rare: 1 in 7142 females; popularity rank in the U.S.: #749)
Example: "I get a tia when I think about Tia."




I am a magnificent ponce.

A Poem About My Insanity

Turn through a thousand corners.
None the right directions.
Only watch the heart-sick mourners
And infinite reflections.

Thinking and speaking gets hard,
When shouts and screams are all you can hear.
I wrote my name on a card,
In case I forget it, lost in the labyrinth of my fear.

Happy then sad,
Bouncing on my puppet string.
Sane then mad,
Will nothing ever end this thing?

Stay, go, I don't much care.
A coin digs deeply into my hand.
Walk away or sit and stare.
I imagine myself on sun-soaked sand.

Nothing helps, will nothing work?
Feverish dreams and alien sights.
Another delusion sends me berserk.
The never ending mental blights.

"My broken mind is leaking thoughts, in the corners and cracks.
I can't cope with this tide of sensation. Filling, spilling, drowning me."

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Well, That Was Crazy.

My mighty assemblies stand,
Shining brightly, Black, red and gold.
They obey my every command
Rich and poor, young and old.

Watch me laugh as I send them out,
Dropping dead as they march along.
But in their hearts there is no doubt.
They know, that I will keep them strong.

But I don't care for their lives,
Anymore than I care for yours.


When I Think About You.

Like drops of water,
Freezing as ice,
Before they jump,
From the frosted edge of a leaf.
Then melting in the sun,
And continuing to fall,
So flow my thoughts of you.



Monday, September 27, 2010

"There's No Place Like Home"

No. There's a billion place like home.
But only one of them is where you live.


Explanations.


Far off, likely stories,
Of bombs and falling floors,
Crazed former glories,
Mask the hidden stores...

Of strength.

It means:
No one believes that an old man fought in a war. His tales of youth are considered lies fabrications. But he learned in that struggle the greatest skill of all. Patience.

Like fire icing my brain,
The ideas I have burn as they fill me
A million skull holes of pain,
The growth and form, like a cruel tree...

Of inspiration.

It means:
Bursting through in blazes of colour are the fears that my fellow man has gifted me with. What some consider art is just a pain in my head trying to escape. So I hope you enjoy them. Doesn't mean I can't be pompous.

Bread in the gutter,
The greatest of meals,
The morning wing flutter,
To feel what he feels...

An enlightenment.

It means:
Street urchins are forever downtrodden, eating refuse, and dying young. But the great of this world can hide in unlikely places. Greatness in not external, it is an internal quality to turn the ordinary in what it truly is. Extraordinary.

What do you know?
You are but a child,
You still need to grow,
uncivilized, weird, wild...

And Untamed.

It means:
Why do we see the need to turn everything that is not like us to become as us? Is it human nature to kill variety and difference? Be it, youth, age, culture or manner. It seems that "growth" is necessary for us all, so lets go to our "teachers".


Do Any Of My Posts Start With 'E' ?

La la la la.

If Hannah is reading this, I love the new look of your blog, Alexander Pope is pretty awesome.

This is her blog, If she hasn't deleted it: http://eternalsunshineofhannahsmind.blogspot.com/

To everyone who follows (openly or in secret) my blog, I love you, let's get married. If you are reading this, you get fifty points and a hug.

Anyway. How about a rhyme?

Let's all go swim in jelly.
And get sticky and smelly,
Then have a shower,
For half of an hour
In strawberries and cream,
And we'll never get clean!

Oh Joel you handsome word-smith you. No wonder all the ladies fancy you and your Irish accent.

Holidays huh? I know! Car-ay-zee!

I should probably accomplish something meaningful with all this free time.

....

I'm going to go play Batman now! :D


Sunday, September 26, 2010

Jay-Blue Way.

So basically, I just need to find a happy medium between being ridiculously full of myself and being horrifyingly depressed.


Wearing Out The Soles We Walk On.


Built from clay and sawdust,
In the shape of a boy,
Run through the forest.
Wearing out the soles we walk on.

It amuses me,
How the earth can revolve,
And not care for its occupants.
Wearing out the soles we walk on.

Imagine a sentient hair mite,
Fearing the hair growth crisis,
And dreaming of the future.
Wearing out the soles we walk on.

I never used to have opinions,
I just made things,
And cried yellow tears.
Wearing out the soles we walk on.

I never knew you people,
I cared about you like you do me.
Fear not forgetful ones, be blessed.
Wearing out the soles we walk on.

Everyone has shoes,
If they can buy them,
We tread over rough ground.
Wearing out the soles we walk on.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Piece of Paper

Paper. Thin and without any true form. Pretty colours adorn its outside, inked in with brushes from the past.

A piece of paper blown through the air. No control, no purpose, only tossed down dark alleys and across wet pavement by the fingers of the wind.

Soon all writing on it will become illegible. And soon after that, it shall be forgotten.

As is right.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Misconceptions

Napoleon Bonaparte wasn't a short man. He was average hight. The confusion arose from the differences between measurement in France and in England.

The Great Wall of China is not visible from space. No astronaut has ever said he could see it.

There is no particular part of your tongue that can taste particular tastes. All taste buds across the surface of your tongue can taste salt, sugar, bitterness and sourness.

A bumble bee's flight is not inexplicable. A few scientists a long time ago guessed they could not fly, with flawed techniques. The flight of all insects is well understood.

The colour red does not anger bulls, it is the flapping fabric that incites them. The colour red is chosen to mask the bulls blood after, and indeed before, the fight. Healthy bulls are rarely used, and they are nearly always bleeding before the fight even starts, to give the bull fighter (Materdor) a better chance of killing it.

Jihad does not mean holy war. It simply means "struggle" often in a spiritual sense.

Nowhere in The Bible does it say that the fruit consumed by Adam and Eve in The Garden of Eden was an apple, it is merely portrayed as such in western culture. Jewish tradition states it was most likely a fig.

Thomas Edison did not invent the light bulb. But he did produce the first practical light-bulb in a partnership with Joseph Swan.

Joel Hollands is not a murderer or a drug addict, he just likes wearing black and is quite approachable and friendly.

Joel's friends.

Close


The last curtain is cut and close
Time behind has stopped and froze

Yellow numbers spinning around,
Watch the numbers spin.

Oh look, oh look at the wax work dolls
Follow them down the fol-de-rolls.

"Fol-de-ol' roll"
Smell the setting sun.

A mote loops the castle,
A brown paper parcel.

Dabble in the string and paper
Cut it up, wrap it round.

Lucky Lucky you
You deserve it too.

Friends friends everywhere.
Sounds like news.

Rhyme Away Thy Sadness

Laugh long at yourself
It's all you can do
Memory from shelf
The past, so blue

Hold the wonder
Fight in the sound
I made a blunder
King I was crowned

I can sing over
An awful song
Four leaved clover
Horseshoes, strong.

Breathing hard
The race is lost
Jealous guard
Protects the frost

A Burnt finger writes
Some cold old words
The star now lights
The flight of birds

Over and under, in and out
Happy fishes joyfully swim
Salmon, bream and river trout
Smooth rocks can skim

A lung full of smoke
Can make you die
The fat men choke
On vomit, why?

Reading and writing
Paper and books
War and fighting
Evil's hooks

Change of thoughts
All things must end
A death of sorts
And a buried friend

Sore, tired eye
Rest your lid
Forget your lie
Devil be rid

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

The B That Was Way Too Damn Big.


Imagine a letter in a book. Some letter. Any letter. B for example.
It sits in its book. This small B seems normal. One day though, it is a little bigger than normal. the next day, larger again, so what? But it grows and grows, crushing the sentence it is in to the sides. Slowly but surely the sentence becomes illegible. Then the page too, is impossible to read around this enormous B. The books binding swells, buckles breaks apart. But the B is still growing. It grows and grows. Bigger than a man, a house. It is towering over the clouds. Bigger, bigger still. It can be seen from space now. It is in space now. It has thrown the earth off its axis, this B, grows and grows and grows, planets, then stars spiral around it. Its mere size consumes the galaxy, it stretches out into the furthest reaches of space. All things are smaller now than this B. Everything in the universe is crushed and squashed and destroyed buy its unstoppable expansion.
Finally, even infinity cannot cope with its incomprehensible giganticality. And space-time fractures, shattered to pieces, implodes into nothingness. The B is everything. And now, nothing.

I have such a bad headache.

Monday, September 20, 2010

Grey.




No happiness, no sadness, no anger.
No melancholy or fear or hope.
No laughter.
No tears.
No hate or love.
No darkness.
No light.

Only grey.

Grey, grey, grey...

Till the end of the day.

With These Eyes.

With these eyes I have seen first-hand,

The way the world can treat those with no voice.

The beauty in the mechanics of everything.

The power prejudice has to turn good people to monsters.

The bite of betrayal, both expected and from corners that are sacred.

The deep desire for approval.

The reflection of time through the eyes of a child.

The tears of a loved one, covered by shame.

The wish for things to go back to the way they were.

The coldness in a heart as something wonderful degrades.

The feeling of terror in the face of truth.

The powers that are unseen to most.

The fear of entering your own home.

The impotency and weakness of youth.

The utter hopelessness of broken foundations.

The broken bitter anger of a madman.

The wonder of mortality, and the desire for immortality.

The difference between Good and Evil.

The crushing black wave.

The limits of a single person.

The miracle of survival against unsurmountable odds.

The golden dawn.

Things that you would not believe if I told you.

I am seventeen years old.



Cast From The Sky.



Thrown down on bare earth
Cursed and spat upon.
Forgotten.

Left in the dark, to claw at the mud.
Eating worms and breathing smoke.
Desperation and wide eyes.

Arms, once muscled and strong,
Reduced to sticks.
Thin and weak.

Tears roll down the face.
To be so audacious as to ask.
For freedom.

But with these feelings,
Come anger.
Anger so strong to burn a soul to nothing.

Despoil what you cannot enjoy!
Ruin the earth for all!
"None for I, None for any!"

Death! Death to the world!
Creation cannot be mine.
It shall be No Ones!

If I am to burn,
So shall burn all,
I shall be the great destroyer.


Sunday, September 19, 2010

Backstage

All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women are merely players,
They have their exits and their entrances.

- The Bard.

He was right.
But there was more.
there is a stage
we all dance on.
But more,
More.
There is
A backstage.
And to see it.
Sends you mad.
I should know.
The "backstage"
Of all the universe.

This Is what it is like:
Too look out, inspires madness, and tears.
Too look in, makes pause for wonder, and joy.
For to look out one can feel the fear, the terror of infinity, compared to you.
But to look in, one can see the individuality, the complexity, the artistry of you.

I wish you could see,
What I have seen.
I wish You could feel,
The things that I have felt.
To hear those sounds.
Calling calling.

I couldn't live with out them.
I can barely live with them.

Is There A Devil In Me?


I could tell you what I think.
But you wouldn't believe me.
I could smoke and I could drink.
But it wouldn't make you see.

I'm a down and out awful person.
Your loveliness I stain and worsen.

People who like me, they don't know.
That underneath all my charm.
The bad in me, it never will show,
I'm only out to do you harm.

I'm cruel and I'm clever and I'll smile and be mean.
My heart was stamped of cold metal, from a machine.


Thursday, September 16, 2010

Curtain, Be Pulled Back.


"And so I learned the ways of other worlds, past the curtains most people do not even know exist. The worlds behind the mirrors, hidden in lost whispers or growing in the shadows"

THE NIGHT OF THE SEVENTEENTH FOG, ROLL IN, ROLL OUT.

The fog seeps in and in. It hangs in the air. The streetlights shine through, yellow stair cases to the sky. Slippery and fish-like, swimming back and forth, it is the truest of the night-time answers. Oh but that it were tangible, then we could dance on silver rails, all the way out... Out... Out into the open lands of infinity. Cloud castles, winking stars unhidden.

THE RED ORB OF UNKINDNESS RISES AGAIN, DISAPPOINTMENT FOLLOWS.

Halt the passage of time at each step. Its movement is too fast to capture, let it be examined through the lens of total cease. Watch as the ordinary and mundane, becomes unhollowed, revealed as what it is. Beauty. But still. Purpose remains. Let it be slowed, stopped, and left that way. Then as each aspect is categorized as beautiful or otherwise useless, let it start again and then slowed and stopped once it has sufficiently rearranged itself... Repeat.

BUT THAT ABSOLUTE PATIENCE COULD BE ACHIEVED.

It cannot. Let it be said that that was all that could be done. To be finding anything impatience must exist. Waiting does not provide all answers.

AND VENTURE INTO THE WILD LAND BEYOND, WITH ARMOR NATURALLY.

Man was not made to exist deep in the ocean depths. To explore such places clever machineries are built, and elite groups dive deeply to seek the mysterious dark underwater plains. Why then do we explore the "Backstage" without sufficient protection? All know that madness follows. Then why not build such a submersible to explore the truth? Devices surely could be crafted.

BRING ONLY THAT WHICH YOU NEED, WANT OR CAN THINK OF TO BRING, LIMIT OF TEN SUITCASES.

Impractically. It is the cornerstone of endeavors of any great nature. So that is where the lost things and one-time-use-only unrecyclable (only goes through one cycle) garbage that piles up will finally find its use. Or not. It is garbage after all.

TERROR BEYOND BELIEF!? THAT REQUIRES COUNSELING.

Talking through and examining issues can cause serious harm. Perhaps it is buried for a reason? Let it stay buried. Unbothersome. No-one is going to care anyway. The terrible wonderful things that happen, will always happen, thus they are ordinary, correct? It is all an illusion.

STOP READING, RIGHT NOW.

Why didn't you do as I asked? Boredom? Curiosity? Contrariness? A lack of notice? Well whatever it was, thank-you. My request was ill advised. Please, continue reading, you have done the right thing.

COLDNESS, LIKE THAT OF SNOW.

Swiftly melting particles of ice encase, trap and ensnare. Oh so pretty, the young ones chant. What does that even mean? Why is that more beautiful than, say, a rain of severed human ears? It isn't. But it must be. Purpose? Not present. But so strange it is. Why then, why then? This is so! Triumph! The world is not meaningless, it still has questions, vital questions, that need to be answered, or at least asked. Unanswerable maybe, but the questions in themselves are real! they shall provide the pathway to all things.

SO MUST IT GO, THE WAY OF THE CASSETTE PLAYER.

But fret not. It shall be replaced by newer, better, greater, shinier ideas, filled with an altogether smarter purpose. No, do not cry at its death, only rejoice at its pleasantry, though now gone. At least, perhaps, some small moments of yours have now been enhanced slightly. And that was the whole point after all.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

I Never Thought I'd Need So Many People.

A purple flower opens in the sun.

No-one sees it.

No-one smells its scent.

No bee collects its yellow pollen.

It closes again against the sun's rays.

It wilts.

It dies.

It never opens again.

And its grey remains are swept up by the evening wind, and scattered.

The flower is forever gone.

Beyond recall.

Except by me. I remember the flower that nobody saw, that fulfilled no purpose.



Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Purple.

Dark.

Little tiny steel moments flutter through out stretched fingers.

Silvery in the nothing light.

Walk along your dark, grey stone hallways.

Smooth air, cool, quiet, over head, underfoot.

Velveteen Purple all around.
Bare feet.

Feel my sadness, like a piece of raw liver.

What am I doing? Lying here, breathing in the blackness.

Breath in, breath in the blackness.

Let the blackness fill your lungs.

Mmmmm...

HATE.

PEOPLE WHO THINK THEY KNOW EVERYTHING:
Oh, hello there little person. I'm all of humanity here to tell you that the totally unattainable thing that everyone wants, like eternal life or infinite wealth, isn't really all its cracked up to be and you don't want it. Doesn't that make you feel so much better about you not getting it?


ME:
No it bloody doesn't! How would you know what it is thats good for me? Screw you and your broken philosophy for dumb people!

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Finest Of Her Kind.

Known to me for many years,

And noticed for not enough of them,

You are empathic to my fears,

And my sins you do not condemn.



Humble in her beauty,

Possessed of intellect without arrogance,

Her place may not be here,

But she shall find it, in time.



That one so fair should grow,

Like a rose of kindness among weeds,

My amazement does not show,

In my soul she has planted seeds.



She deserves so much more than what she has been given,

She can heal a broken thought by her presence alone,

So many broken thoughts I have,

Being with her is a joy to one such as I.



She shall stand against the terror of the world,

Intact, whole where others of so called strength,

Have burned, shriveled, blackened and curled,

The distance of such fortitude is great in length.



She is one, who I am unworthy to call friend,

She has all the grace of an angel called to earth,

If any could be by my side while I was in pain it would be her,

I do not lie when I say, she is worth twenty of her kind.


"Possessed of all the virtues of man without his vices"

- Lord Byron.


Rays Of Light Reveal Only More Mystery.


Life in a shell of waxy memory,
Pull your hand across the surface,
Away comes a layer of passed moments,
Dry and flaky, falling from your hand.

Lilliputian people stare up at me,
As I stride across the sky.
I am not your shining one,
I am not your 'Emerald Wizard'.

Pompous people in expensive clothes,
Recoil at my presence in the street.
I am not your circus freak,
I am not the virus on your perfect world.

Rivals of nature filled with fire,
Spit at me in passing.
I want none of your prize,
I am not your enemy.

My friends dance in their circles,
Complex individuals each one.
I am not the ally you think I am,
I am no more honest than a cobra.

Fellow conjurers make their performances,
We challenge each other in our cleverness.
I am not unaware of your ploys,
I am enjoying your trickery, as you enjoy mine.

Sample these flavors of life,
Taste each one.
And tell your makers,
What wrong they have done,
In the name of God.

The realm of God
Cannot be pierced
By one talent alone.
The curtain requires more than one pair of hands to lift it.


Saturday, September 11, 2010

The Delicate Man.

The delicate man made of porcelain, porcelain for skin.
Run-run
Run-run
Let's go for a run.
From the delicate man
Let's run away
And live today.

"Oh I know," Says the delicate man,
"I know where you go,
Oh I know just where
And when you go,
To where you go,
I will find you there."

The delicate fingers of the delicate man,
Will wrap around you throat.
The delicate fingers of the delicate man,
They squeeze you till you choke.

Painted china face,
Footsteps light like grace,
The delicate man
The delicate man
Shall kill you nice and neat,
The delicate man
The delicate man
Thinks you're such a treat.

Watch in the dark for the delicate man,
Watch in the dark for him,
Fingers deft,
A chin that is cleft,
And a figure tall and thin.



Friday, September 10, 2010

Danse Macabre

Dance for me in a clever ring, laugh and dance around,
When you hear voices start to sing, never touch the ground.

Mr. Fixit

Well, if it wasn't broken before, it is now. *shrug* I'm gonna eat some eggs with bacon, and some mi goreng.

Blah de blah de blah de blah.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Possessed By Truth


Lift the crusher
Onto my hands

Lift the hammer
Against the pane of my thoughts

Lift the hot iron
Press it to my eyes

I am become bitterness
A joyless creature

I have seen the infinite
I want none of it

It is chaos
Spinning terror

Behind the curtain
A boundless harmony of evil

A glimpse of the workings
The briefest catching of light on the puppet strings

All knowledge of its truth
Is gone as smoke through fingertips

Left is only the emotion
Of repulsion and overwhelming horror

Such demoniacal things
Hold our minds together

Our minds
Tiny copies of our universe



My greatest wish so altered, so wrong.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Just A Day In The Life Of Joel

1) FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

2) Cherry ripes are tasty, I have great friends.

3) Ho hum.


(This is me being angry ^)

You'll get a real post later. For now, lol at my stupid.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Quiet Haikus


Please read slowly, or not at all.

Rolling ocean
The blue of night fills my earth
See me sail away

Today I forgot
who I was for a little bit
It made me happy

I balance my
Mind on a razors edge
A knock causes pain

I'm too smart for this
Those other boys may see hope
I just see the end

Usefulness isn't great
Only coward mutterings
And a leg with cuts

Opportunity
It is lost in sunshine truth
revealed as lies




I'm Laughing Inside That You Took That Seriously

SCARECROW: Have no brain!

TIN WOODSMEN: I have no heart!

SCARECROW: Neither do I. Who gives a crap about that?

This actually happens in the book with different words.

Sure I'll kiss you in the rain. But I'll be wearing a bright yellow and distinctly unromantic poncho. I dislike being wet. And everyone will laugh at YOU.

-Me.

Things that girls have taken seriously that I said to them:

"Call a doctor, because you stole my heart"
I mean that doesn't even make sense!

"If you buy me cola today, I'll love you forever"
Because forever is the amount of time it takes to open a bottle of cola.

"I am so smart that they hooked me up to a smartness improver machine and it broke"
I'm not proud of that moment...

"I could tell you liked me by the way you put eyeshadow on in two layers today"
Turns out I was right. Twice.

"This thing on my swiss army knife can hypnotize you"
Beware my powers!

"You look especially lovely today"
She didn't. She had money.

"I'm joking. I'm not scared of you, you are very nice"
Crap crap crap crap get me out of here, could I get through that window?

"I'm very fond of you"
Replace the word "you" with "your wallet". Only girls have purses not wallets... Whatever!

"Absolutely"
The question was "Am I your favorite?"

"You look like the personification of beauty herself"
She actually looked like a girl in an expensive dress.

Not all men are arrogant pigs. Just like not all girls are manipulative bitches.

Just Most of them.


Monday, September 6, 2010

Admit I'm Clever People!

Dude. "stings like a love triangle" that was clever! And as for that little poem! That was so cool! Definitely stood out. Sigh... lol, never-mind.

Anyway. lets try and keep up our positive attitude without indulging in ridiculous acts.

Black buttons on my art book,
How loverly and round they look,
Red tape on the cardboard corner,
It is far prettier than any other.

Yeah... not my best. Lol.

A little cold in here. Maybe I'll put another memory in the mental fireplace.


Sunday, September 5, 2010

The Ultimate Cure


The cure to feeling sad, guilty, hungry, depressed, lonely in pain and tired is...

I'm buggered if I know. But in a brief afternoon nap of about 30 minutes, a magical fairy came down and slipped some in my green tea with lemon. AND NOW I FEEL GREAT!!!!

But seriously. I'm actually so happy. For reasons unknown. *shrug* Who gives a damn! Happy is great! Not conducive to making art, writing or school work... But Uber fun!

YEA-HA! I love being me! (dances in a circle)

You guys don't seem to understand exactly how happy I am...

Linky:

LOL! BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Crypticity Abound On The Blog Of Joel.

Beautiful Youth:

Years until metamorphosis is complete,
Pupae breaks, butterfly emerges,
Flies, flies,
Shrivels in the suns heat,
Quickly dies.
The exposure and deprivation easily purges.

The Minds Of Children:

Zealous undernauts assault delicate machinery,
For a worthwhile cause?
Should the integration or extirpation begin?
Use what was given, rely on what is true?
Silver legs run in around and around,
Head severed, eyes blind.

Inner Octopus:

Cancer of the intent.
Confusion radiant, an internal sun.
Though it was in reemission,
It grows again stronger,
Fouling and defiling,
But not breaking momentum.
Death to the intent.
Death to the intent,
Death to the intent,
So dies hope.

Incarnate:

Horse gallops across,
Horse gallops across,
The past?
The taste,
The fast,
The race.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

The Things I'm Afraid of Are Many.

Sleeping with my boots on sounds comical, but I'm doing it tonight because I'm afraid. If I just have my Doc Martens on my feet, then I can still run, and if I have my little torch, I can still see, and if I have my swiss army knife I can get through a locked door. Its is these small things that bring a tiny piece of healing salve to my fears.

Silly little boy.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

I Don't Know.

I wait all day

Everyday

To get away to where I go

To the building drifts of snow

And the good I lack

Then I get back

And lie down.

And die down.

Just count to ten

If I couldn't do it then

Why could I do now?

In what way, how?

No, I can't. And I never will.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010