The Dog.

People call you the "dog" and I guess you are kind of like a dog.

You're my dog. My horrible, horrible dog. You piss on the floor of my personal relationships, I have to take you everywhere, You bite me, you hurt me and you are such a nuisance. You ruin good days, and you make bad days hell.

But you know what?

At the end of the day, I fucking own you. Not the other way around. I own you. I am your master.

So suck on that. Unfortunately there isn't much revenge to be had against something that doesn't really physically exist.

On the plus side, I feel awesome tonight.